We were already doing that.
We just do it differently—and that’s okay.

Letting our kids run barefoot in the grass (I gave up on shoes a while ago), build forts, help in the kitchen—even if it means a mess—dig in the dirt and sing like no one’s watching.

We are letting them be kids—free to play, imagine and explore.

So when someone said, “You should just let kids be kids,” it didn’t land as encouragement. It stung. It hurt and gave me some tears of anger. Because I do let my kids be kids, I just don’t want them running around out of control.

Because it felt like they weren’t seeing what we were already doing. Worse—it felt like an unspoken critique, like I was doing it wrong. Like I was a bad mom. UGH!!!

We do let our kids be kids.
But we also teach them manners.
We expect them to be polite—not just at home, but in the world.
We have rules and structure because that’s what helps our kids thrive.

When Support Comes Across as Judgment

Most comments from family or friends are well-meaning or we hope they are. 
But when you parent differently—or even just intentionally—those “kind” suggestions can land as subtle jabs. Ones as moms we don’t need, because if we’re honest we beat ourselves up enough.

Especially when you’ve worked so hard.
You’ve built rhythms and routines that help your family find peace. You’ve created structure that supports everyone’s needs.

Maybe you choose not to serve sugar all day.
Maybe your kids know the importance of saying “please” and “thank you.”
Maybe your family prioritizes real food, manners and clear boundaries—because structure helps your children feel safe and loved. Most kids thrive in structure and ours definitely do.

And yet…
When someone says, “Just let them be kids,” it can feel like they’re saying you’re doing it wrong.

But how do they know what’s best for your kids?

Why It Feels So Personal

Motherhood is emotional, hard and beautiful—all at the same time. Most days feel like a roller coaster.

We pour our hearts into making thoughtful choices:
How we feed our kids.
How we guide them.
How much screen time they get.
What routines help them feel secure.

And when someone questions those choices—or casually comments without context—it can feel like a judgment of you. You as a mom. 

Recently, I felt judged for choices I make every single day—choices I know are right for our family. And it made me pause.

Because sometimes it’s not just the words—it’s the look, the tone, the unspoken comparison.

It gave me a lot to think about.

Yes, Let Them Be Kids—With Boundaries That Serve Them

Here’s what I believe:

• You can let your kids be fun, free and creative—and still teach them to respect others.

• You can encourage independence—and set clear boundaries.

• You can say no to junk food—and still make meals joyful and delicious.

• You can give your kids a beautiful childhood—without letting go of structure.

That’s intentional parenting.
Not controlling. Not rigid. Just thoughtful.
And it’s okay if not everyone understands that.
(I have to remind myself of this often.)

You Know What’s Right for Your Family

You were chosen to be your child’s mom.
You know their hearts, their needs, their strengths, and their challenges.

You’re doing an incredible job balancing fun, freedom, and foundation.
All three matter.

They’re kids now—but you’re helping shape them into kind, confident, respectful adults.
And that takes both love and limits.

Because we’re not just raising kids for today.
We’re raising them for their future classrooms, jobs, marriages and families.

If You’ve Ever Felt Misunderstood by Family…

You are not alone.
You don’t need to defend your boundaries.
You don’t need to explain your sugar policy, your food choices, or your routines at every birthday party.

Stand in your values.
Lead with love.
And walk in confidence—even when the room is quiet.

Need a place to talk it out?

If you’re feeling overwhelmed, judged, or unsure, I’d love to connect.

I offer free 15-minute clarity calls to help moms feel seen, supported, and encouraged. Sometimes that’s all you need to reset.

👉 Book your free call here

Or explore The Simplified Mom Method—where we create routines and rhythms that reflect your values and support your family’s needs.

Love and Grace,